Fiancé & Finance | Our Biggest Money Fight During Our 4 Year Relationship #Finance

welcome back to the channel another segment of fiance and Finances my name is Stephen I’m a pharmacist and this is Christine I’m also a pharmacist so we

both invest in Real Estate and invest in general so today I want to talk about our biggest money fight and I’ll let Christine dive into the details but our biggest money fight biggest fight I would say collectively happened about maybe about a year into our relationship um so

Spill The Spill The Bean all right so I think about about a year into dating together Stephen was laid off and he was just gun hole on his financial Journey he was like so into like retiring early he had a set plan he wanted to retire in his 30s and was just like looking into all these different

avenues for investing whether it’s laundromats RV parks you name it as for me I was like still working at my same job that I’ve been at for about three four years at that time and I feel like I just didn’t wasn’t growing as much and because of that I just it was kind of like

a attack on myself where I felt like he Stephen was growing so much uh because he was all constantly learning whether it’s like listening to podcast at like 2x feed or watching YouTube on his free time or just like learning from like blogs or different like posts and I just thought I just saw

that I wasn’t growing as much I was was like stagnant in a way didn’t really enjoy the job that I was at and because of that I just saw that oh like Stephen wasn’t like the same person that I knew anymore just because he was just so different from when I first met him he was just

learning a lot more he was on his financial journey I just felt like he was kind of like going on it without me and because of that we got in a huge fight I didn’t know where he was going at that point like we were just like diverging into two different roads and that was kind of scary for me

I was just like either I I’m probably going to be left behind I’m we’re probably gonna break up because we weren’t on the same page uh how did you feel about it Stephen yeah so you know obviously when I got laid off during covid it was like pretty shocking for like both of

us right like I literally just relocated from uh San Francisco to Orange County and then during Co unexpectedly like I just boom one day showed up and I got laid off and from nowhere and you were at the job for not even 6 months yeah like maybe six seven months and then I got laid off it was a nice

job it was pretty laidback it was pretty chill um maybe too chill which is why I got laid off um but it was just really shocking and I think my identity was I felt like it was shattered because I was just a pharmacist yeah um and I was on an upward trajectory in Pharmacy right I was a pharmacy

director at two hospitals and I finally relocated to Southern California uh to be closer to you um and was a pharmacy manager so it was a little bit step backwards but at least I was here and the job was easy but the moment I got laid off I was just like wow I I poured literally my whole self in

Pharmacy right we did The Five-Year program became pharmacist at 23 and I slowly gradually moved up right so I just did everything I thought I was supposed to do to be a good pharmacist and to be a good Pharmacy leader but when I got laid off um it just shattered me completely so then I latched

onto a new identity right my before my identity was being a pharmacist but now after being laid off I was like I had hatred towards Pharmacy for good reason right and so I latched on to this whole like Real Estate Financial Freedom uh trying to retire early movement so I went you

know for me I’m the type to when I do something I go 110% right like you really did all podcasts all YouTube CashNews.cos I joined like a a mentorship program for multif family Real Estate uh just whatever knowledge I could grasp on to I would like surround myself and that

was like very intense like admittingly yeah I didn’t know who you were anymore you were just like totally from Pharmacy all complete 180 to Finances and then I was not

about that life I didn’t know much about Finances at that time I just felt like Stephen was constantly talking about it and then that was like the last thing I wanted

to talk about after work yeah so like for me like every time she’d visit me you know keep in mind she’d visit me like you know maybe two three times a week and I just would rant about like personal text-decoration: none;">Finance right like life Insurance or multif family Real Estate hour at a time yeah hour at a time so like she would just sit there looking at me like a Blank Stare uh ironically I tell you guys like what inspired me to create my

YouTube is like she’s sick of listening to me so I just talking to the camera to share my journey right yeah I was like instead of like telling me about the same thing every day might as well like Enlighten other people out there tell someone who wants to listen to me right so and I remember

for me my perspective was oh like I’m on this journey and you know you’re my significant other my girlfriend at the time so I’m like why don’t you either go on it with me or at least be supportive of that so I think that’s how I kind of felt attacked a little bit I

think you were also thinking what kind of girl doesn’t want like a guy who’s so ambitious who’s so passionate into like retirement or early retirement Into the Fire movement you just like clueless you were just so confused yeah and I remember telling like Christine like most girls

hate guys who lack ambition right like they know smoke weed play CashNews.co games all day right and do nothing with themselves but for me I’m the complete opposite where I’m like I’m overly ambitious and like you’re the only one that’s like oh that’s a turnoff

um so like to me it was just like confusing like don’t you want this like don’t you want a guy who’s like kind of more ambitious and striving for more right but I think it came down to maybe because I felt like I was growing so rapidly and you were stagnant so you felt like

you’re being left behind not only that it’s just like everything in moderation I just felt like it was just like you can’t just like Focus only on financial real financial and Real Estate you have to eventually go back into Pharmacy because that’s basically

who I knew you as like a pharmacist that’s how we met so I just like two different identities and then I was just kind of confused and I didn’t know who you were going to be in the future and know or like even two years down the road yeah yeah because Christine likes stability right so

before she just knew okay Stephen he’s a pharmacist Pharmacy manager so you make a little bit more than your typical pharmacist and that’s that’s easy to understand right like just work your job make x amount of dollars we live a good life pretty comfortably right but now I threw

in this wrinkle of like oh all of a sudden he’s buying like 80 units of Real Estate in like eight months and for me that was that didn’t sound stable at all it just sound like it could be it could go flop in any time yeah like I I could of if I didn’t do it

correctly lost too right like so I see her perspective and that was also like during Co where everyone was getting into something like that whether it’s um Airbnb or like anything even none;">Crypto like even Crypto nfts or like during that point yes so like she just saw me like doing a bunch of crazy businesses that like she was like opposed to for good reason I might

end up losing money on those um and you I lost in my mobile home park too which she saw me buy I remember I convinced her her I try to convince her to do it and finally she was like you know what just do it it makes sense but once I saw it for a law she’s like oh I told you I told you so

right so like but thanks to me losing money on that deal and it gave me a lot of clarity and made me more realistic where now I’m kind of somewhere in the middle now where I went from all real all Pharmacy into all Real Estate and once you get slapped in the face a couple

times from Real Estate now I’m like okay I’m balancing Pharmacy and Real Estate now in a more realistic kind of pace right so I feel like that’s how I kind of grew and develop over those those three years I would say where I went really extreme

towards Real Estate and then I think uh Christine also like learned a lot about herself and what she wants I think to just being going along with me for the ride yeah but especially now in hindsight like I totally understand why you went through the whole path of avoiding Pharmacy

and going all into far into Real Estate I if it were the same if it were happened to me I would have done the same as well yeah like like to me I was just like oh like I didn’t want to depend on Pharmacy as an Income right obviously if I get laid off I mean

there are jobs out there I could have gotone a job like but it was kind of an interesting pause point for me to be like so what else can I do or what else are we truly passionate about right like so that’s what was kind of an expiration phase for me and the way I saw it too was like this is

the only phase in my life where I could take this risk right because if I had kids in a family obviously I wouldn’t take that risk I wouldn’t buy a mobile home park and get an RV park under contract after that and do all these crazy things I kind of wanted to get out of my system to be

honest so that I would live with like no regrets at least that was kind of my mindset definitely um but I guess how have you kind of seen me kind of change like through this process because of like your mobile home park uh it didn’t go as well as you expected I think you eventually found that

middle ground where you come to terms with Real Estate you know that it’s good for the future but it’s not good for today versus what for in order for you to survive today you need a job and eventually that will come together and then it will merge and it’ll give

you a good life but in terms of in terms of now you would just want to have a good balance in terms of your money coming in today which is your job and eventually like looking into seeing if your retire your Real Estate can retire you down the road yeah and to add on to that for me

what I’ve learned is like right at this point if I were to buy more Real Estate my quality of life doesn’t necessarily improve right at this point you 52 units yeah and you want like stable units that are like eventually paid off and if you keep on buying them

what’s the point you always have the mortgage exactly and you know even though like you know I do lot of Debt right 5 million in Debt it does tack on the back of your mind right so now I’m kind of hitting the point where my qualif would not improve by

buying another 20 30 unit apartment complex but if I were to sell a property and pay off my primary residence and have no mortgage that would improve my quality of life significantly more right so that’s why I’m looking to make those pivots where yes it’s better to have like I had

90 unstable units right so I offloaded my mobile park to go to 52 more stable units but I could even take further more chips off the table and own let’s say 51 units more stable right so it’s really assessing and taking those chips off the table and that will improve my quality of life

at that point I can decide or we could decide like do I want to buy more Real Estate does it make sense right right so overall I’m glad that we did have that fight a year into our relationship it was actually a really difficult fight it’s not something that was resolved

in a day I would say we slowly like um talked about it over the course of a month because you were still going through the job process you were going through multiple business ventures um so I think we slowly like talked about it every single day uh every time we will like meet up we will like see

if our goals still aligned and if it’s something we could like see into the future yeah so that’s kind of the D of that argument but looking back like today like yeah it looks minor right like at the time it felt really big was our biggest argument but that’s our biggest argument

it’s not even that bad right so at least we a would hash it out um early in the relationship versus like just ignore it until like you’re married with kids and that’s how like divorces happen so you know glad we’re getting hash that out so anyways hopefully you found value

from this CashNews.co and got to learn from our biggest fight and what Clarity we got out of that if you’re interested in buying multi family resid and guidance check out the link down below for description uh please let us know any questions that you have or interested to learn about your

biggest Financial fight in the comments uh please like comment subscribe and hope to see you next one thank you so much see you next time